


Not a Mistake

by seokimji



Category: NCT (Band), SM Rookies
Genre: Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-06
Updated: 2016-12-06
Packaged: 2018-09-06 22:01:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8770999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seokimji/pseuds/seokimji
Summary: It’s been two months already since they broke up, yet Youngho still can’t get over his ex-boyfriend. And then one day said ex-boyfriend shows up at his house.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys!
> 
> Please be aware that English is not my first language so there might be mistakes. This was originally written in my native language and in order to improve my English writing skills I translated this.
> 
> Hope you'll enjoy!

Crowd. The noise of the subway. Stuffy air. This is what the rush hour in the late afternoon offers for Youngho – and for thousands of other people – when he gets on the subway to get home. Out of habit, he tries to find a place for himself at the other end of the car by the door. Finding a seat at this hour is impossible, and as he looks around he has to take notice of not being able to stand by the door because even the standing places are already taken there. _Fantastic._

He stands opposite an unshaven man in his thirties, earphones in. Youngho’s listening to music, too, and he really isn’t in the mood for letting the outside world in right now, so he closes his eyes as the vehicle starts moving to shut everyhting out. He’s focusing his attention on the melancholic melody playing in his ears, making the perfect pair to his current mood. He’s not exactly sure, which one causes the other – whether he’s listening to these kinds of songs because of his state of mind, or the other way around, he’s feeling down because of the gloomy songs. Maybe it has to be the first one, if he thinks hard about it; sadness is always lingering there under the surface recently, even if he is in a good mood.

The metro car stops by the next station and Youngho’s eyes open up, so he can give way for people getting off. Some of them pass by him, a careless person even pushing him with their huge bag. Youngho holds back an annoyed grunt; he really hates this line in the rush hour. He tries ignoring the unpleasent circumstances by concentrating on his music, not noticing the girl by the door across him, who’s sending him curious glances from time to time, trying to catch his attention. She’s waiting for him to look up, hoping that she can catch his eyes but it doesn’t happen.

Of course, the poor girl has absolutely no idea that her attempts at ogling Youngho are totally in vain, since he’s still hopelessly in love with the boy he broke up with two months ago. It must be because of the sad song, that raven strands of hair, that cute little nose, those impishly shining eyes and the countless metal piercings and earrings worn by the other, appear in his mind’s eye. He can see the other boy’s sweet, sometimes shy smile; the smile that could turn into such a challenging, confident and cheeky one, leaving Youngho weak in the knees. He remembers every tone of his voice clearly – his loud, sunny laughter; his nasal speaking voice; his sleepy, quiet and hoarse groaning in the morning; his endearing cooing; his annoyed grumbling and his tiny, satisfied sighs and deep moans coming from his throat –. And Youngho remembers the way his voice sounded when they were shouting at each other across the room. The fight ended with a slammed door, their relationship officially over.

He wanted to remember that the least. If it was possible, he would erase his last memories with him, creating new ones instead of them. But he can’t. The boy made it clear for him that their whole relationship was obviously a mistake and he couldn’t even imagine, why he got together with Youngho in the first place. And it hurt. This one hurt the most; he felt as if his heart has been ripped out from his chest. Of course Youngho didn’t tell him that time, why he himself got together with the other boy, but he had his clear reasons. He did it exactly for the reason why he still couldn’t get over him; why he could think only about him; why he regretted every word he said so thoughtlessly; why he wished being able to turn back time so he could do everything better.

Youngho is so absorbed in his own gloomy thoughts that he almost forgets to get off the subway in his stop. He quickly steps out of the train, heading towards the exit. By the time he turns into the street where his apartment house is located, it’s getting dark outside and chilly wind blows into his face. He’s approaching his home with slow steps and he’s quite close when he spots someone standing in front of the building. Their figure is way too familiar, and Youngho’s heart stops beating for a moment because _what if_ –

It’s him.

Hands in his pockets, the other boy’s standing there with a gait that radiates hesitancy, like as if he’s feeling lost. Youngho can’t believe his eyes. He has no idea what brings the other here, and he doesn’t know whether all of this means something good or bad for him. Youngho starts walking up to him, steps unsure, and it only takes a few seconds for the other to look up and notice him.

„Ten –” Youngho speaks up first but he doesn’t even kow what he should say. The boy in front of him is just as beautiful as he was the last time he saw him, but his dark eyes are deep abyss as they look up at him.

„Youngho,” Ten says a bit surprised, as if he wasn’t expecting him to turn up.

„Why – why are you here?”

„I just –” Ten starts, evidently feeling embarrassed. He’s tense and he keeps changing his weight from one leg to another, looking everywhere but at Youngho. „I’m here to see you.”

„Me?” Youngho asks dumbfoundedly, even if it should be obvious, since Ten’s standing in front of his house. But the fact, that they broke up two months ago, therefore they have nothing to do with each other anymore, is still there.

Ten nods slightly at his question but he remains silent. Youngho resists the urge to gather him in his arms. He’s never seen Ten so unsure, so fragile before, like now under the lights of the gateway, glancing up at Youngho timidly.

„I’ve missed you,” Ten says so quietly that it’s to be feared that the autumn wind picks up and carries his words away before Youngho could catch them. But Youngho catches them, he hears them so clearly as if Ten has whispered them right into his ears. He suddenly feels it difficult to breathe, his heart wanting to jump out of its place.

Ten is here, he’s come to Youngho because he missed him. This is more than enough for Youngho to get hopeful.

„I’ve missed you, too,” he tells Ten gently, when he finally finds his voice, accomodating to Ten’s soft tone.

Ten is looking up at him, his teeth are biting at his lower lip a bit, his posture is still speaking of his lack of courage. Youngho can see on him that Ten has something to say to him, so he waits patiently, even if he barely manages to contain his curiosity.

„I – I just –” Ten lowers his head, looking for the right words to say. Then he glances up at Youngho again; this time long, deep, with such pure emotions in his dark eyes that almost make Youngho dizzy. „I still love you, Youngho.”

His voice fades a little at the last syllable but it doesn’t matter anymore. Youngho doesn’t think anymore, he just acts; he dissolves the distance between them with a few quick steps, taking Ten’s face into one of his hands, bending down. He’s scanning Ten’s eyes for a moment, searching for permission silently, which he gets by Ten closing his eyes, then their lips meet.

The kiss starts off passionately, this is after all a meeting of two hearts in love, encountering after two months of foolish and meaningless agony. Youngho have never kissed anyone with such insistence before, letting out all of his piled up pain he’s felt through these last few weeks. Ten kisses him back wholeheartedly, radiating off the same yearning Youngho feels. Youngho puts a hand on Ten’s waist, pulling him closer. The boy approves his action with contented humming and a small sigh, while Youngho’s other hand is caressing his face. He can feel Ten trembling under his touch.

They part abruptly when suddenly the alarm of a car goes off near them, scaring them with its sharp, blatant squawk. Youngho is breathless, eyes still closed as he tries getting some air into his lungs and he’s overjoyed when he notices that Ten’s breathing is just as fast and shallow as his. He glances down at the boy, who looks back at him with big, innocent eyes, his face flushed.

„Oh,” Youngho moans almost inaudibly when Ten suddenly hugs him, wrapping his arms around him, burying his face in the taller one’s neck. Youngho’s heart is beating crazy as he hugs him back – he’s always loved that Ten was shorter than him with quite a few inches, making them fit for each other’s arms perfectly. They stand there for at least two minutes without a word, enjoying each other’s presence mutely. Nothing could bother them at this moment, not even the bad-tempered old lady who lived on the ground floor and always gave Youngho ugly stares when they met in the stairwell.

„Youngho,” Ten speaks finally, with his face still in the other’s neck, not wanting to draw back. „Does this mean you – ”

He doesn’t say it out loud but Youngho knows what he means.

„I love you, too, Ten,” he says quietly, kissing the boy’s black hair, which makes Ten’s hold on his side stronger.

„What’s going to happen to us now?” The thai boy asks next. „We did have some problems after all.”

„Yeah, we did,” Youngho nods, but nothing can shake his faith now, not even Ten bringing up the bad memories. „Maybe – I think we were too impatient with each other.”

He’s been thinking about this a lot, what could it be that lead up to them breaking up, and he figured that both of them were at fault. There was something about them which made them a great pair from the very first moment, made them get along with each other really well – their personalities had a lot in common, but they weren’t the same. They also had a lot of differences, and sometimes these differences proved to be too big. Not being able to handle this properly caused problems between them and the lack of understanding affected their relationship in a really bad way.

„I think you’re right,” Ten mutters.

„We have to learn how to adjust and – how to talk about our problems instead of just fighting,” Youngho goes on.

„Youngho,” Ten says as he draws back a little so he can look into his eyes. „I’m so sorry for saying – for telling you that I –”

„Let’s just forget about that, okay?” Youngho interrupts him, swallowing. He knows exactly what Ten wants to say but he doesn’t want to bring that up, not when it was one of the most painful things anyone has ever said to him.

„No, wait,” Ten stops him as Youngho tries to hug him again. „I really didn’t mean what I said you that time.”

„I know. I know by now,” Youngho says, voice a bit stifled, happiness flooding his whole chest. „By the way, I also said some things I’m not proud of.”

„But I went too far,” Ten insists, his whole face remorseful.

„It doesn’t matter anymore,” Youngho puts an end to it, taking Ten’s hands into his, stroking them a little.

„Okay,” The younger boy smiles, and it’s like the sun is coming up after two months of darkness.

„I think it’s time to go up,” Youngho says and Ten’s eyes brighten up at that. „And talk about this.”

„Let’s go,” The thai boys nods kindly, turning around and heading towards the gate without further hesitation, leading Youngho by the hand.

They aren’t perfect. But they love each other, ready to give themselves another chance, so they can fix what they’ve done wrong the first time. Because all of this was not a mistake but the first chapter of their love. And the second one begins only now.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/s1arblossom) so we can cry over NCT together ^^


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